The Gift

My mother has gift buying down to a science. She asks me what I want for my birthday or Christmas and than she buys it. Even though I know what the gift is she insists on wrapping it and presenting it to me on the special day.

Only once in the past twenty-five years has she broken with tradition and the gift I received means more to me than all of the others combined.

To understand its value a little background is necessary. My mother is not a religious woman. She was baptized and raised a Catholic. She took her first communion and was confirmed when she was in eighth grade. My father and her were married in the church and she continued to attend mass on a regular basis. That is until she divorced my father and was told she was no longer allowed to take communion. She attempted to explain that my father was an alcoholic and an unfit parent. Her arguments fell on deaf ears. The church "graciously" allowed her to attend mass but she was banned from participation. My mother chose to no longer attend mass.

On the other hand she baptized the three of us and sent us to Catholic school. She would drop us off at mass each Sunday and pick us up when the service was over. However the only time she would enter a church was on special occasions: baptisms, first communions, confirmations, weddings and funerals. Like I said by no means could you describe her as being religious.

As I grew older I began to question my beliefs and my spiritual journey has taken me down many different paths. I continued to attend mass with my grandmother more out of tradition than faith. I never disowned the church like my mother but I never developed the blind faith of my grandmother. For me religion was something to be explored not accepted at face value.

That being said, about fourteen years ago I began wearing a silver chain with an old crucifix on it. I no longer remember the reason. It may have been a gift from a girlfriend or just something I picked up. Over time the chain became tarnished and the crucifix began to look that it had survived the two millennia since Christ's birth.

The Christmas season arrived and I had presented my mother with my usual list.

Christmas day arrived and with it the usual family festivities. I gave my mom and stepfather their gifts and my mom presented me with a very small box. I was stumped, confused, bamboozled and speechless. My mother had broken with tradition. I knew that none of the gifts on my list would fit in such a small box consequently I had no idea what was in the box I was holding. I must have sat there for five minutes trying to unravel the mystery of what could be in the package.

My wits finally returned and I opened the present. The wrapping paper had been covering a box that resembled the type that rings come in. I knew it wasn't a ring so I was still confused. When I finally managed to get my fingers working again and opened the box I was stunned.

Inside was a fourteen caret gold crucifix and chain. My mother the affirmed agnostic had purchased a crucifix for me. My mother is not one to show emotions but when she saw the joy on my face I could swear I saw a tear or two in her eye. As I thanked her she tried to hide her feelings by explaining that she only bought it because she was tired of seeing the old one around my neck. I removed my old crucifix and chain and replaced it with the new one.

In the fourteen years since I have only removed it for x-rays and surgeries. Also, I can honestly say that this gold chain once saved my life but that is a tale for another day.