Time

Days pass into weeks and weeks pass into months and so on. Time continues to march despite all of the mini dramas we live through each and every day. We carry grudges, we harden our hearts, and we shut people out of our lives for the smallest of offenses. We place importance where it least belongs and we let the moments we should cherish pass through our fingers like a grains of sand. Then a moment from out of the blue shocks us to our core causing us to stop and take stock of our lives and the meaning we assign to the pettiness that surrounds us.

Today I was hit by one of those moments. Today I was forced to take stock of where I am, where I am going and what my future holds in store for me.

Today I found out that my mother has bone cancer. She has already survived two bouts of breast cancer and a major heart attack that laid waste to one third of her heart. She has always been a fighter but only God knows how much fight she has left in her.

I have spent the day wandering around in a fog. My stomach felt like I had swallowed a large boulder, my heart has moved beyond pain and my mind cries out for the day to begin again and for the comfort of my mother's bosom.

I am not ready to say good-by. I am not ready to stand-alone against the world. My mother has always been my rock. My port where I weathered each and every storm, she has stood by me through thick and thin her loyalty and love never wavering.

From my birth year to this my forty-fifth year she has been the one constant in my life, while friends and relations have come and gone she stood as a silent sentinel gently drying my tears and healing my wounds.

She alone must receive credit for any light I may have shared with the world, while any darkness I may have exhibited is my own responsibility.

I cannot predict what tomorrow may bring. Only God knows how much time she may have left. However much time there is will not be nearly enough to express to her my thanks and my undying love for each and every precious moment she has shared with me.