Traditions

I spent Memorial Day weekend in Bullhead City, Arizona visiting with my mother. Most of the visit was spent in Laughlin and Las Vegas, Nevada as my mom's favorite past time is playing video poker. I did however find time to revisit our families history by perusing the many photo albums my mother has put together. One of the pictures that captured my imagination was of my great-grandfather Quinto Spelta with his parents that was taken circa 1895. The photograph brought to mind the stories my grandmother used to share about the old country and its traditions.

Just four generations ago in Italy arranged marriages were still the norm.

On a clear day in 1893 Quinto noticed my future great-grandmother Maria Scribante, thirteen at the time, coming home from the bakers. With just that glimpse he lost his heart and made a promise to himself that she was the girl for him.

He returned home and announced to his parents that he had found the person that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Of course, they were taken aback. Tradition did not allow for children to choose their spouses. He had to marry whom the family chose. His father asked about his son's new found love but he had no facts to share he did not as of yet even know her name.

He worked on his parents for several weeks and their resolve did eventually weaken. They told him to find out who his mystery woman was and where she lived. Armed with that information his father would approach the family about arranging a marriage.

Eventually the fathers met and without too much squabbling they were able to come to an agreement. When Maria turned eighteen Quinto and her would be allowed to marry. Unlike most arranged marriages the bride and groom were introduced once before the wedding. They did not have to wait until the walk down the aisle for their first look at their spouse.

Quinto and Maria enjoyed a long and fruitful marriage. Seven children and a move from Italy to Missouri were only two of the grand adventures that they enjoyed. The beginning of their marriage may not have been built on love but over the years they built a foundation that was meant to last.