Tuesday, February 10, 2004

Age

How old is old? What is the definition of age? In an astronomical sense the only definition of age or time for that matter is the orbit of our planet around our sun. Someone who has achieved fifty years has seen the earth complete fifty orbits of the sun. Does that make them old? We have an obsession with age in our society. This obsession rears its ugly head in many areas from advertising to movies you are either to young, to old, or just right. Which brings me to my rant on the subject of aging; age differences in couples.

If a man is dating a younger woman (by younger I am referring to ten years or more) no one blinks an eye. It is commonly accepted through out society. His friends all look up to him and they all secretly envy him. He is player. He is hip. He is sexy. Jack Nicholson, Hugh Hefner, Bruce Willis, Jerry Buss are all out there without a word of criticism.

However if an older woman is dating a younger man we tell a different story. She is robbing the cradle. She is making a statement. She is desperately holding on to her youth. No one seems to envy her. No high fives. No acceptance. No support. Nothing.

Why the double standard?

I am not sure where the double standard came from. I only bring up the subject because two women I know and respect are dating or about to date younger men. One is ten years older; the other is thirteen years older than the man. They both have already received advice from friends and family concerning the "mistakes" they are making. Each in their own way is having second thoughts not because of how they feel but because of peer pressure.

Frankly, everyone should mind his or her own damned business. It is hard enough to find happiness in today's world without undue pressure from those around us. People say that love is blind. In a way it is. When our heart falls in love it does not consider age, beauty, wealth, or anything else. The hearts only consideration is love, the love radiating from another soul and its own. It is when our minds and especially our ears get involved that love goes wrong. When we listen to everyone else's opinion and ignore our own heart. When we rationalize and analyze and twist into knots what our hearts feel. When love becomes a confusing maze rather than a path that two souls decide to travel for a while.

My advice to my friends, fly with your hearts and enjoy the ride.

1 comment:

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